oh alright pictures

so today was an inservice day so the district nurses had a meeting where we learned about useful things like concussion management and how to get rid of bird mites (itch much?)  I finally wore my smaller clothes and I got lots of, "wow, you're looking great," or "wow, how much have you lost" Truthfully part of it felt good, but part of it made me super self conscience. My friend, Martha, fellow nurse, although she's nurse extraordinaire...seriously she's super smart, and other friend and fellow nurse, Pam (amazingly caring!) and I went out for lunch and afterwards Martha told me to give her my phone so she could take pictures of me....I've been meaning to blog ME with my new clothes -- so why not!

 Me and Pam....She's letting it all go gray and is looking great! I'm thinking of doing that myself.  I can almost see a waist!

 Hmmmm....well, work in progress....but hey, they're blue jeans...haven't done that in awhile.  oh and better yet...$21.99 at Ross -- my new favorite store.

The sweater/cover $10.99 at Ross. I like my new jeans...if they had a pair one size smaller, I would have bought it at that price for a couple months from now (yeah, I'm optimistic)

Have a great Friday!

Wednesday Weigh In

Starting Weight: 320
Last Week's Weight 258
This Week's Weight 256

I've been so bad about blogging. I used to blame it on getting my master's.  I blamed a lot of things on getting my master's and yet I am still dropping the ball on a bunch of stuff.  Ugh. And I'm not getting my master's any more (because I have it, not because I gave up). So...I think I finally have to admit it to myself.  I am a flake.

ugh.

The good news.  I went shopping and bought some 2x stuff.  Then kept it on the chair in my room for a couple of days wondering if I should try it on.   So I tried it on and it fit...WOW. I really am a size smaller.  It's been a long...LONG time since I've been there.  Not only did they fit, but I could see a difference when I wore those clothes.  I showed my husband - who was not quite as excited as I was.  When I asked him why, he said he wasn't surprised because he's been telling me I'm smaller for weeks now.  I'm the one that had to 'catch up'....

So caught up now....

Will post pictures later.

Have to go do really important pre-work things...like brush my teeth and get dressed.

Wednesday Weigh-in, actually on Wednesday

Starting Weight 320
Last Week's Weight 261
This Week's Weight 258

I hit the 60 pound park...wow.

So let's talk about hair....I didn't worry so much about the loss of hair because I have a lot of it.  Well, now I'm not sure I have enough to sustain the loss I'm experiencing (and yes, I'm taking Biotin).  When I wash my hair, the hair coming out gets tangled in my fingers. Today the shower wasn't draining as quickly and when I explored why, it's because of my hair. I have to clean my brush out a couple times a week.

It's a little crazy.

I would much rather have the be cold all the time...I'm waiting for that one!

Any other suggestions besides biotin on what to do with hair loss? Has anyone tried that shampoo, Ovation?

Other than that, even with that, I'm happy with my results. Yay me.

can you lose 60 lbs in just your face?

I posted pictures (under pictures tab) since I'm at the 60 pound mark. And I know I've posted this before but it's really hard for me to see a difference, or much of a difference. My husband says he feels it when he hugs me. I see it in my face (but hard to believe most of the 60 pounds is in my face). I see that my clothes are little baggier, but they do still fit....it's not like they're falling off of me.

It's amazing to me that I became this overweight.  I don't think it's so much that I'm used to being thinner that I can't see the difference but more that I never looked at myself because I was too afraid to do so.

We had no full length mirrors.

If I ever looked in a mirror is to concentrate solely on my face -- IF I decided to wear makeup that day.

I really didn't know what I looked like. A general idea, but not until I started taking these pictures did it really hit home.

And to know that I got to the point where 60 pounds lost isn't a much more dramatic change is a bit depressing.

I'm not depressed, just this thing is depressing.

I know that I'm taking charge of my life, that this is in the past. But it is something I need to address with myself, so that it doesn't happen again.  I can't be so easily swayed by denial.  Denial is a very comfortable place to in...but not healthy, at least in this case.

So for this day forward, no more denial about what fat/obesity looks like - physically and emotionally.

It may not be comfortable but I can handle it and it's good for me.

Wednesday Weigh In - on Thursday again..

Starting Weight: 320
Last Weight: 264
Today's Weight: 261

Total weight lost: 59 lbs.

Almost to 60 lost....so close...whoo hoo...I think next week I'll get there!

We've been doing C25K (you can see the schedule here here) now for three weeks. Although, we are only on week two of the schedule...we're taking it slow. Well, I'm taking it slow and my husband is just amusing me.  I do have to say it is getting easier each time we do it.  I was telling Jason, my husband, that it's still hard for me to believe we'll be at a point where we're running the entire time.

And by running, I mean bouncing at a walking pace.

Have a great Thursday everyone....Just two more days until the weekend.

Unless you have kids in sports, which I do, so really there is never ever a weekend.

Ever....

This is not something other parents told us when we were contemplating parenthood......

New Blogger

A friend from the neighborhood has decided to blog about her experience. She had bypass two years ago and has gone Vegan. She's blogging about it here.  She's an awesome writer and she's a beautiful person to be around too.  Check out her blog and say welcome.

What size am I?

I had a recent follow-up appointment with the nurse at the surgeon's office. She told me how great I was doing and I said, 'really' because I don't feel much smaller.

She totally understood. She has had this surgery herself. She called it fat-girl syndrome.  Even though she is at or close to her goal (I didn't ask, she just looked like she was), she said that she still feels like she's too big to fit into certain sizes, or through the door.

She said, I should probably start buying smaller clothes.  At my highest I was in a loose 3x or sometimes a 4x.  My 4x clothes are really loose and my 3x's are loose but wearable and even though this is the case, the thought of even trying on a 2x is too out of my reality right now.  Because I really don't feel like I've lost enough weight to be in a smaller size. I really (at almost 60 pounds lost ---- SIXTY) do not feel smaller.

Very frustrating.

A little scary too -- frankly, not sure if I'm more scared to feel smaller or that I'm not feeling smaller.

She suggested that I go to a store...not buy anything...but try some smaller stuff on. And by smaller, I mean 2x stuff -- it's not like she's asking me to be self-defeatest and try on a size 6 something.

We did both agreed that it's great wearing scrubs..because you can get away with wearing those through a couple different sizes.

I was shopping with a friend and I saw a pretty cute outfit. I also have to go to a wedding in October (husband's boss's son's wedding).  Soooo, I thought, why not? I bought it in a smaller size (2x). I didn't try it on (too scary) but I do think with the way things are going I'll be there by October (even if I won't feel like I look differently)

Here's the outfit. Cream colored sweater set (and yeah, I'm going to wear pearls with it, because pearls and sweater sets go together like PB&J). And a long A-line skirt  with a fun raised patter on it.

It's actually an outfit, I'd wear as a skinny person (yeah, yeah, I run a little a preppy that way).  I feel myself getting closer to shopping at regular stores...I, at least, can shop in the big section at the regular stores now...The 3x's there run a little smaller than the 3x's at, say LBry-ant or online and I was limited to very few choices.  So now I have some more choices...I'm liking that.


Oh yeah, also liking the health benefits and more energy...Because it's not JUST about the clothing choices....(insert wink here).

HAPPY LABOR DAY!  one of the nice benefits of being a school nurse is holidays OFF.