Thursday, January 16, 2014



I've gained even more weight. Was dismayed to see the scale creep (ok really freaking JUMP) up to 220...I'd been making steady progress down and whoosh.

My body betrays me in this one area.

My mind betrays me as well -- grazing, unthinkingly popping food into my mouth, not being continually present with my food choices.

It gets me down.

(frowny face)

I wonder if it's my wonky schedule.
Working nights is not good for our bodies
for our souls

my off time is spent carting kids around, trying to be the mom I need to be for them, being supportive, making sure they feel loved, making sure their bodies and souls are being fed -- in appropriate and loving holistic ways. Trying to be a loving wife (sex? what's that, who has time and when we do, our schedules are different)

my off time is spent trying to keep the house clean (total fail there, but not feeling horribly bad about that - there are more important things in life - am I right?  no one's died of some incurable bacterial infection -- yet). But I do like the order that comes with a clean organized house.

my off time is spent furthering my education so I can ultimately reach my goal of teaching nursing.  I know the night shift thing is temporary and a means to an end to reach my goal of teaching as is taking this time to make school work within my hectic schedule.

Even though I am doing this all for a particular goal, it still is so hard at times.

I'm completely overwhelmed.

so, ugh.


  1. One day at a time! Hope things ease up a bit for you.

  2. First, breathe. Next...think of happy things. Sounds stupid I know...but I tend to get caught up in everything that is going wrong or is hard or seems unfair. Then I take an inventory of everything that's going right, or is good and it makes things seem better somehow. Hang in there sweetie and can always vent here. :)

  3. When I get overwhelmed, I find it helpful to close my eyes, take a deep breath and then scream until blood pours out of my nose. Hey, whatever works!

  4. Man! You are fighting a battle! Be kind to yourself, it will work out!

  5. Oh no, overnights are the worst. Hope things start getting easier, the body is definitely NOT programmed to be up at those times!

    And I agree with Lorie, be kind to yourself - it's always going to be hard.

  6. OMG - nights are terrible for bodies - sleeping, eating...all of it. I'm sorry it's been rough. We're all here for you.

  7. I agree with Miss Lorie - be kind to yourself. Try and "slow your roll" and take a breath at some point during the day...hang in there - its all worth it!

  8. Hang in there, sweet girl. Read Holly's most recent posts @300 pounds down, some really good ideas there tor help with these same struggles. You are a rock star for all you are doing! Please, recognize that.